Why Does My Heart Feel So Bad? ~ June 25th-July 1st, 2018

Last week was a great celebration for the solstice! Your heart is now open to a new arc of development. But last Monday, Neptune in Pisces turned retrograde, creating the potential for an existential crisis to emerge.

Though it would be nice to say that your troubled feelings will be over soon, this week there is a lot of potential for some very difficult days. (and nights)

There may not seem to be any obvious solutions to your current problems. But remember that this impending climate of darkness surrounds the Full Moon in Capricorn produces its own ripening effect, making things sweeter, rounder and deeper. Patience is the key.

Why does my heart feel so bad?

In the last week of June, the rosy glow of the Sun in Cancer will be eclipsed by the cold and distant gaze of Saturn in the opposing sign of Capricorn. Some of the champagne sparkle of newborn summer will be poured down the drain, washed away by feelings of rejection, isolation, and insecurity.

Why does my soul feel so bad?

A small spell of summertime sadness may emerge. Shhh…It’s okay to feel bad sometimes. It means that your heart is discerning and that your soul is seeking deeper places in which to shine.

It may be especially mournful to feel the tender heart of Cancer become bruised or broken. But Cancer’s softness and beauty should not be mistaken for weakness. The nurturing wisdom of Cancer has survived much harsher conditions than this. Remember, just because you feel soft does not mean that you are too fragile to handle yourself.

The Sun in Cancer teaches you to become soft as sand, yielding to the flow of the ripples and tides. As the light of the divine mother shimmers upon the waters, feel a gentle reminder of how much love there is for you in this world.

Why does my heart feel so bad?

Overwhelmed by the Saturnine feelings of coldness and isolation, let the Sun in Cancer guide you to seek out soothing, healing and comfort. There are so many ways to do this for yourself, but music is usually best.

The music your heart needs this week should be soulful and impressionistic, something like this song from Moby’s 1999 album Play.

Why Does My Heart Feel So Bad was composed to highlight the deeper colors of human emotion, the mood indigo that lies within the heart of all sadness. The beauty of the song is its simplicity, in the honest feelings laid bare against simple chords. 

Why does my heart feel so bad?

Why does my soul feel so bad?

Like the season of Cancer itself, this song’s magical purpose is to heal the heart and awaken the soul by finding sweetness even in sadness.

During this week, there is no need to seek out overly complex ideas or clever solutions to your problems. To find the comfort and security you need, just relax into a warm bath, letting a soulful song illuminate the whole universe of love and loss within.

Monday/Tuesday: Why Does My Heart…

Mars Retrograde in Aquarius

On Tuesday, Mars will begin his two-month retrograde phase in the sign of Aquarius. The effect will be noticed most strongly in the feeling of inertia that descends. So many of your best-laid plans will drop to a standstill. The more frustrated you become by this maddening stasis, the more you will understand what aspects of martial energy you need to heal.

Your propensity to become enraged, reactionary, or rudely impulsive will be tested during the upcoming months. Your lack of patience will emerge. Your lack of compassion will arise. And so will your feelings of frustration about your own progress and success. Yes, your performance is being criticized, but this is for the good of your spiritual development.

Why does my soul feel so bad?

When Mars is retrograde, you must become humble enough to discard habits, relationships and ideas that are just not working. Once you can accept the inward turn of energy and the slower tempo, you will be gifted with an extraordinary opportunity to reset your priorities and re-envision plans.

Though this may not be an entirely pleasant transit, remember that the time spent in the war room developing strategy is just as important as any action taken on the battlefield.

Wednesday/Thursday: Why Does My Soul…

Full Moon in Capricorn

On Wednesday, the Full Moon in Capricorn will be conjunct Saturn retrograde, calling forth the power of some dark and heavy emotional burden. This Saturnian Moon will lay its gravity on you, pushing you down into pools of loneliness, guilt, and sadness. Even the most optimistic will feel a crushing sense of moral responsibility upon their shoulders.

To increase your patience and compassion for yourself and others, at the Full Moon it would be wise to remember what Henry Wadsworth Longfellow once said:

“Every man has his secret sorrows which the world knows not; and often times we call a man cold when he is only sad.”

It’s okay to be sad sometimes. Everyone has secret sorrows.

Late into the night on Thursday, Mercury will leave behind the sweet and sentimental waters of Cancer, entering into the fire sign of Leo.

Considering the heaviness you have had to endure at the Full Moon, you may feel starved for some illuminating energy. Though the flames of Mercury in Leo have many noble and benevolent qualities, at this time your mind will be vulnerable to following the most solipsistic paths.

With Mercury and Venus in Leo now, you will find it easier than ever to justify all your moods and wild tempers.

Friday/Saturday/Sunday: Feel so Bad…

Moods and tempers are something to be cautious about now because in the earliest hours of Friday morning, the waning Moon will conjunct Pluto, summoning layers of unconscious energy to rise from the deep. Without preparation for this transit, you may become possessed by a sudden rage or an eerie coldness. Stay keenly aware of the shadows that lurk in the periphery of your inner vision and move carefully.

Why does my heart feel so bad?

Why does my soul feel so bad?

Until next week…

 

Much Love,

 

Rachel

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